But they provide such excellent material to write about, I just can't help myself. Don't get me wrong. My own family provides equally funny and disturbing material, but there's a big difference...my mother reads this blog. Iris and Joe will never ever get a computer.
As I type this, Joe is doing a jigsaw puzzle. This is the third one he has started in two weeks. He spends endless hours on these things and never gets anywhere. Inevitably he says that there are pieces missing and he goes on to the next one. Poor Joe. Always buying puzzles with missing pieces.
We had a few minutes to kill this morning and Robin suggested we get a bagel. Joe was driving his Jag. He drives like a bat out of hell and yesterday he got a speeding ticket. So this morning he was driving around, looking for the bagel place, the entire time saying, "Vere is dis bagel you vant?" Robin told him and he stopped in front of the place, didn't park, just stopped, and told her to go get her bagel. Robin said, "Well where am I supposed to eat it? You won't let me eat in your car." Joe told her to eat it on a bench and we'd circle around until she was done. Robin changed her mind about the bagel.
Meanwhile, Iris is almost as bad of a backseat driver as I am. I'm worse. Today she told Joe as he turned down a street, "This is no good, Joe".
Joe: "IVIS! Stop telling me how to drive!!! I know how to drive!!! "
Iris: "Fine, Joe. I won't say another word. Get in an accident for all I care".
10 seconds later...
Iris: "JOOOOE??? Where do you think you're going? You're going the wrong way."
I used to joke around about spending time with Robin's parents as being like spending time with the Seinfelds. I was wrong. It is exactly like spending time with George's parents, Estell and Frank Costanza. Except that I'm the one screaming "SERENITY NOW". In my head, of course.
Joe just slammed his hands down and said, "That's it. Crazy people selling puzzles vith missing pieces. To hell vith it." He then dumped the whole thing in the garbage and I'm sure he'll start up the next one in about 47 seconds.
As I type this, Joe is doing a jigsaw puzzle. This is the third one he has started in two weeks. He spends endless hours on these things and never gets anywhere. Inevitably he says that there are pieces missing and he goes on to the next one. Poor Joe. Always buying puzzles with missing pieces.
We had a few minutes to kill this morning and Robin suggested we get a bagel. Joe was driving his Jag. He drives like a bat out of hell and yesterday he got a speeding ticket. So this morning he was driving around, looking for the bagel place, the entire time saying, "Vere is dis bagel you vant?" Robin told him and he stopped in front of the place, didn't park, just stopped, and told her to go get her bagel. Robin said, "Well where am I supposed to eat it? You won't let me eat in your car." Joe told her to eat it on a bench and we'd circle around until she was done. Robin changed her mind about the bagel.
Meanwhile, Iris is almost as bad of a backseat driver as I am. I'm worse. Today she told Joe as he turned down a street, "This is no good, Joe".
Joe: "IVIS! Stop telling me how to drive!!! I know how to drive!!! "
Iris: "Fine, Joe. I won't say another word. Get in an accident for all I care".
10 seconds later...
Iris: "JOOOOE??? Where do you think you're going? You're going the wrong way."
I used to joke around about spending time with Robin's parents as being like spending time with the Seinfelds. I was wrong. It is exactly like spending time with George's parents, Estell and Frank Costanza. Except that I'm the one screaming "SERENITY NOW". In my head, of course.
Joe just slammed his hands down and said, "That's it. Crazy people selling puzzles vith missing pieces. To hell vith it." He then dumped the whole thing in the garbage and I'm sure he'll start up the next one in about 47 seconds.
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