Sure, everyone knows everyone else's business. And when things happen, good or bad, the rumors run rampant. But if you can get beyond that, living in a small town is really pretty cool.
I'm from a small town in Upstate New York. Northville. Born and raised there. Went to the same school, Northville Central School, from kindergarten through 12th grade. With the same kids all those years. Half of my Facebook friends are people from Northville, some of whom I know and some of whom I know through friends.
A dear friend recently passed away unexpectedly. The tragedy has touched many many people. He was very loved and respected. His widow (God, that's hard to write) happens to be my best friend since kindergarten, Ingrid. The support she has received from the people in and around Northville is astonishing. It slayed me (and Robin too) to not be there, but my friend insisted that we will be better support in the future days and weeks, especially when she comes here to visit.
While I am so thankful for the support she and the family is receiving, I am not surprised. What does surprise me is that amount of outreaching I personally have received. So many of those friends of friends contacted me the morning after it happened, making sure I knew and that I wouldn't read about it on Facebook. That touched me so much. (I know Ingrid is saying, "There she goes - making this about herself.") Honestly, that's not what I'm doing. I'm just trying to acknowledge that when something like this happens in a small town, people really do put their differences aside and rally together.
The day after it happened, I spent the entire day waiting for Facebook chatter. Nothing. I couldn't take it any more and the following day, I started talking about it. Now it seems like people can't stop talking about Butch and it's great! People, myself included, have changed their Facebook profile pictures to pictures they have of Butch. And they are sharing stories about Butch that I love reading.
Truth is, I am very grateful for the amount of time I shared with Butch, but it was very limited. Though friends throughout the years, Ingrid and I didn't get to see too much of each other once I went to college in Florida. I have made it back to Northville a handful of times and each time I did, we reconnected (Debbie too) as if no time had gone by. True friends. When her kids were little and I'd visit, Butch always babysat so we could go do our thing. So for years, I didn't really know him. Then at our 20th high school reunion in 2003, when their kids were older and didn't need supervision, we got to know each other. Ingrid and I can be quite the asses (her moreso than me), but he was a great sport and just played along. Those are my first real memories of him and they're very fond ones.
Then, last year Ingrid and Debbie visited Robin and me in Florida. They were only supposed to stay for three or four days. Debbie had to go back to work, but Ingrid had taken the whole week off. We begged her to stay for the rest of the week and, of course, she had to run it by Butch. They were supposed to drive somewhere out of state when she returned to pick up a new car for Ingrid. If he didn't want her to stay, we'd all understand. Not only did he tell her to stay, but he encouraged her to do so and have a great time. We jumped around like little girls.
This past February, as you know, Robin turned 50. I threw together a party as best I could and invited Ingrid and Butch. Ingrid hemmed and hawwed and finally said they couldn't make it. I am very sleuthy and called her at work that Friday. She wasn't in. So I had great suspicion that they were on their way down and I was right! More great memories.
But the one thing about Butch that stands out the most is when I had a job interview a few months ago. He woke up on the day of the interview and said to Ingrid, "Kim has her interview today. You should call her and wish her luck."
If I hold that one special memory so dearly and I really didn't get to spend much time with him, I can only imagine how many people have so many more special memories. The number of people who attended his viewing says it all. According to the "rumors", somewhere between 500 and 800. In a town with about 2000 people.
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