Today. Today I ate cheek.

Ever have one of those wonderful days where just everything is going swimmingly (yes, I said "swimmingly")?  Today was was of those days.  I followed up on a very promising job prospect and received fantastic news - no job yet, but we're making progress.  I sold some more crack and made a few bucks.  (Note to aforementioned potential employer:  It's not really crack.  It's an energy supplement, V3, that is wonderful.  Hook me up and we'll talk.)  Robin received an outstanding raise that is unheard of in this day and age.  Talked to a few good friends on the phone.  It was all good.

Then Robin told me she had to go to Asheville and asked me to meet her there for lunch.  Sure!  Her boss took her to a Mexican restaurant that she has been raving about.  Gave me the address and I got there first.  Thought I was in the wrong place because it was a Mexican convenience store that sold food on the side.  Called her and she assured me I was in the right spot.  Sat down and waited.  Couldn't even eavesdrop to kill time because not one person spoke English.  No big deal.   After all, I did live in Miami for a long time.  So I sat there and pretended that I was listening to the TV.

She finally showed up and said, "Isn't this great?"  I gave a half assed, "Uh huh," and we went to the man who stood behind the unlabeled food.  Hell, had it been labeled, I wouldn't have known what it was unless it said "pollo".  (That means chicken.) 

She asked him what a few things were and in very broken English, he answered.  I ordered something porklike and beans.  Then she pointed to something and I swear to God, he squenched his nose ever so slightly and gave the "white girl, don't do it" look and said something.  She said, "Excuse me?" and he repeated himself.  Whatever he was saying had a double E in the middle.  But this time he pointed to his cheek.  She looked at me and said, "Beef".  I said, "I think he said 'cheek' ".  Then she called me an idiot and ordered some.

Backing up a sec...when we lived in Miami, one of her favorite places was a Jamaican restaurant.  Never trusted her to go there without me for take out because God only knows what she'd order.  Ox tail, goat.  And you can't tell.

We sat down and started eating.  I tried the "beef" and it was good.  Had some more.  Then I saw him looking at us.    I stopped eating it and began wondering if he really had said "cheek".  Obssessed about it the whole way home and googled it the second I got here.

Yep.  I ate cheek today.  It's a delicacy, you know.  Look at the picture above.  Would you know it's not beef?  Actually reminded me of pot roast.  NOT THAT I WILL EVER EAT IT AGAIN.

While I'm at it, I will share another "isn't life great ~ only to hit the wall" moment that I recently exeperienced in Florida.  Had been to the beach, got hot and sweaty and sandy and icky (BUT NICE AND TAN) and came home and jumped in my mom's pool.  Floated around on a float, made a frozen margarita, hooked my nephew's boogie board up to my float and used it as a cocktail table. Was very relaxed and said something llike "I feel like we're at a Sandels Resort".

Ahhhhhhhhh.......

Then I looked up again to make sure a palm tree wasn't blocking my sun, only to find TWO RATS SCURRYING UP THE TREE.    Anyone who knows me well knows that I'd rather have a snake crawl up my leg than to even see a rat.  (And now I further get my point across that I'd rather eat cheek than to see a rat.  I think.)

I screamed bloody murder and my mom ran out to the "veranda" - it's called a patio, Mom. 

"What's the matter?  Are you OK?"

"YOU HAVE RATS, MOM.  RATS!!!!!!"

"Oh them.  There's a garbage dumpster on the other side of the cement wall.  They're just passing through."

How comforting.