Silver Lining

Everyone knows what I'm about to say.

The silver lining to cancer is weight loss.

I've lost a nice chunk of weight - 40+ pounds - since discovering I have cancer. I cannot personally take any credit whatsoever. It's all because of chemo.

When this all started, I swore I would keep up with drinking a lot of water and walking.

I've done neither. But because of my lack of appetite, the weight is falling off. (Boo Hoo, I know.)

However, there happens to be a down side to my silver lining. Yesterday I was dead heading my geraniums while wearing a sleeveless top. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw what appeared to be my arm fish tailing. Upon closer observation, it was the fat of my upper arm flailing in the wind as I tossed the little dead leaves aside.
I've had body image issues very single day of my life, so really not much rattles me. Cellulite - check. Wrinkles - yep. Age spots - uh huh. Gray hair - what I'd give for hair right now!!!!

But this was different. Ew! I debated as to whether or not to tell Robin. She's seen me at my worst, but technically we are still considered newlyweds, so maybe I should just keep this to myself.

After another minute or two of dead heading, I couldn't keep it in any longer.

"Robin? Come here. I want to show you something. But don't judge me! It's only temporary. When I feel better, I'll figure something out. But come look at this! God, I probably shouldn't let you see this. Just come here and look at this!"

"What? The fat under your arms? You have it on the back of your legs too."